More Desire, Oklahoma, Volume 1

Excerpt

Desire for Three: Winning Back Jesse

Clay wanted nothing more than to hold his wife in his arms and comfort her, to feel her soft and warm against him so he knew she was safe. With a warning look at his brother, Rio, to keep his temper to himself, he put the phone on speaker.

“Of course we’re worried about you, baby. Please, just tell us where you are so we can come and get you.”

“No, Clay.” The trembling sob in her voice tore him up inside.

With his heart in his throat, he turned, meeting the cold, hard stare of Lucas Hart, one of the partners in Desire Security Systems—and more than that—a good friend.

Lucas had been giving him dirty looks since they’d arrived a little more than an hour ago, clearly blaming Clay and Rio for hurting Jesse.

Clay blamed himself even more.

He’d hoped, prayed, that Jesse would answer the phone and that Lucas could use some of his vast array of equipment to find her.

Clenching his jaw, Lucas motioned for Clay to keep Jesse talking.

Clay had no intention of letting Jesse hang up, especially after spending the last few hours out of his mind with worry.

“Jesse, what do you mean, no? What happened, honey? We don’t even know what’s wrong. It’s not like you not to talk to us. If you’re mad at us for something, I’d rather you just give us hell like you usually do. It’s not like you to run away.”

“I guess you’re tired of having a woman who stands up for herself.” She said it in such a low voice that Clay almost missed it, but she continued on before he could say anything.

“I’ll be back tomorrow. I just need to be alone tonight.”

“You don’t need to be alone. You need to be with us!” Clay winced inwardly as the knot in his stomach turned to ice.

He kept his voice low, struggling to speak calmly when he was anything but. “You said you’ll be back tomorrow. You didn’t say you were coming home. You’re scaring the hell out of me, Jesse. If you think I’m letting you go, you’re very much mistaken. Just talk to us. Let me explain.”

Her silence scared him, and for several heart-stopping seconds, he feared she’d hung up. When she spoke again, the weariness and distance in her tone frightened him even more.

“Clay, I really don’t want to talk about this tonight. I’ve got to go—”

“No. Don’t you hang up on me, Jesse Erickson!” He scrubbed a hand over his face, praying that Lucas would be able to pinpoint her location before she hung up. Worry for her ate him alive.

“Baby? Are you cold? You left without your coat. Please tell me you’re someplace warm, honey.”

The sob in her sigh tore at him, the effect also apparent on both Rio and Lucas as they listened.

Rio sank into a chair, hanging his head, his hair mussed from running his hands through it countless times in the last few hours.

A muscle worked in Lucas’s jaw, his steely gaze holding Clay’s and his stonelike expression even harder and more intimidating than ever.

Jesse’s voice, so sweet and with a tremble in it that brought another lump to Clay’s throat, came over the speaker, softer now than before.

“I’m fine, Clay. I’m a big girl, remember? I’m not one of those sweet little things that fall all over you. I’m used to taking care of myself, or have you forgotten?”

The reminder of the cold, withdrawn woman he’d met two years earlier, a woman that had thought herself incapable of loving or being loved, nearly took him to his knees.

“I haven’t forgotten a single thing about you.”

The ice in his stomach seemed to spread, making him cold all the way to the bone and stiff with fear.

Her tone, a tone he’d never hoped to hear again, sounded so much like the one she’d used when he’d first met her that his heart skipped a beat and he actually felt dizzy for a moment.

Losing Jesse would kill him.

He didn’t even try to keep his frustration and fear out of his voice, hoping to get through to her.

He had to get through to her.

“Jesse, of course I’m worried about you. You’re my wife. You disappeared into the night without no coat and no dinner. I’m sure you didn’t eat anything. I know you, baby. When you’re upset, Rio and I have to practically force you to eat. That means you’re cold and hungry and I can’t get to you to make you eat, or to keep you warm. You’re hurting and I can’t hold you.”

His arms ached to hold her close.

“Please tell me where you are, Jesse. We need to talk, to straighten this out. I can’t stop thinking about the way you looked at me.” That look of confusion and hurt in her eyes would haunt him forever.

Jesse’s choked sigh cut his heart to shreds. “We’ll talk, Clay. Tomorrow. Look, I’m sorry I acted like a coward and ran off that way, but it was such a shock. I’ve been stupid and never saw it coming. I should have paid more attention. I should have realized that you felt neglected.”

Her voice lowered, so low he had trouble hearing her.

“I’ve always suspected it would end some day. I knew better. I just thought I would see it coming.”

Blade’s Desire: Adoring Kelly

“You look very sexy tonight. Of course, you always look sexy, but when you dress for the club…”

She didn’t want to think about the women that would be there. Scantily clad, if they wore anything at all, and probably all stunningly beautiful. Thin.

“Hmm.” Blade nuzzled her neck in a particularly sensitive spot that he’d mastered long ago. “It’s nice to know my beautiful wife thinks I’m sexy, especially since I think she’s the sexiest, most desirable woman on earth.”

Turning away, she blinked back tears, angry that he would never see her as sexy again, scared that he wouldn’t be able to find the pleasure in her he had before. “Don’t patronize me, Blade. I’m fat and I waddle.”

She tried to push him away, but he cuddled her closer. “Let go of me.”

God, she wanted him so much.

It was a need that would go unsatisfied. Blade had stopped making love to her months earlier, too scared of hurting her and causing another miscarriage.

“Never.” Sliding his hands higher, he began to massage her breasts, his touch soothing on her aching body. “You’re mine forever. I’ll never let you go. Still sensitive, baby?”

Moaning at the pleasure, she slumped against him, the heat of his body against hers easing her aching body. “Hmm.” Turning her head, she lifted her face to his. “Yes, but don’t stop. I ache everywhere. I’m so fat that I can’t even get out of a chair without help. Very sexy, huh?”

Wincing at the tightening around her abdomen, she stiffened. Not wanting to worry him, she bit back a moan, grateful when it passed almost immediately. “You’ve spent months handling me with kid gloves. I was scared of you when we met, even though I was attracted to you—had feelings for you. You were so patient with me, until I could let go, and be what you needed.” Smiling she closed her eyes. “What we both needed.”

Opening her eyes again, she sighed. “But ever since I got pregnant the first time, it seems all you’ve been doing is taking care of me. Handling me as if I’ll break. I’m sure this isn’t what you expected when you married me.”

Blade rubbed her abdomen, his lips warm against her ear. “I got even more than I could have ever hoped for.”

Turning her in his arms, he frowned down at her, his eyes full of concern. “Kelly, you’re my life. You know how much I love you, don’t you?”

Love for him swelled inside her. Reaching up, she flattened her hands on his chest, flexing her fingers into the hard muscle she knew so well. “Blade, you’ve been so wonderful through my pregnancies and miscarriages. You’ve been my rock.”

Blinking back tears, she clenched her jaw when another pain hit her—like a rubber band tightening around her abdomen. “I don’t know what I would have done without you.”

“You’ll never have to be without me, baby.”

Scared now, she looked up at him through her lashes, and voiced the fear that had been choking her for months. “We’re never going to be the same, are we?”

Blade stilled, his eyes narrowing. “Kelly, what the hell are you talking about?” Wrapping an arm around her, he led her to the bed, urging her to sit. “You’re tired, honey, and you’re in pain.”

Wincing at the ache in her back, she laid on her side, curling her body as she searched for a comfortable position. “I know you love me, Blade. I know how much you want this baby. I’m just afraid. You haven’t touched me in months. I see the way you look at me. Something’s missing. I miss that look.”

Blade positioned himself to lean over her protectively. “Of course I want this baby. I want you, too, Kelly. I’ve never stopped wanting you.”

Blowing out a breath, he laid a hand on her abdomen as he knelt on the floor beside her. His expression softened, but his eyes narrowed in concern. “You’re tired, baby, and uncomfortable. Just stay here. I’ll call the club and tell them—”

She didn’t want him to see her this way. She hated the fear in his eyes. Knowing he needed a break from all the tension, she forced a smile. “No. Just go. I’ll be fine. I feel better already. I’ll just lie here for a while.”

Leaning close, Blade cupped her jaw, brushing his lips over hers. “I always want you, Kelly, but we both have to be patient. You really don’t expect me to spank your gorgeous ass while you’re pregnant, do you? Or put clamps on already tender nipples?”

Kelly swallowed the lump in her throat. It had been so long since he’d done either of those things. “Blade, you love sex. Love to play, but you haven’t touched me in months. Even after I have the baby, it’ll be a while before I recover. Then, I’ll be nursing. You’re never going to want me that way again. You’re too scared of hurting me now. I see it in your eyes.”

A sob escaped before she could prevent it. “Love isn’t going to be enough for us, is it? I’m going to lose you.”

“Kelly, that’s enough.” The impatience in his tone scared her.

She’d never known Blade to be impatient about anything.

Cursing, he ran his hand over her abdomen again. Closing his eyes, he blew out a breath, before opening them again, holding her gaze with his tortured one. “You’re getting all worked up over nothing.” Frowning, he glanced at her stomach before meeting her gaze again. “You’re having contractions, aren’t you? You’re in even more pain than I thought. Were you even going to tell me?”

He shot to his feet, cursing soundly. “We’ll deal with that later. Stay here. I’m going to go call your doctor.”